Tom Cruise has a passion problem (do you?)...

Hello Passion Seeker!

 “Acting isn’t my job. It’s who I am.”

That’s a quote from Tom Cruise. Yes, he of the high-speed running, biplane dangling and clearly powerful vitamins.

Tom is an extreme example of someone whose passion has fused entirely with their identity. And, as I watched Mission Impossible (thoroughly enjoying it BTW!) it made me wonder: is that something to admire? Or is it something to avoid?

When I speak about passion in my keynotes, I describe the two kinds defined by academics:

• Harmonious passion: energizes you, fits with your life and leaves you and others better off for having pursued it
• Obsessive passion: takes over, eats away at your peace and destroys everything that matters. (Scary, right?!)

Tom is fascinating because he blurs the line. His commitment is bonkers: he identifies the goal knowing he's a novice, he learns, he practices, fails, and does it again. For years.

There’s much to admire in that kind of drive. When we see someone throw their full self into their work, it can be a reminder of what’s possible with such belief. But then there’s the other side.

In interviews, Tom talks about his 7-day weeks (easy with unlimited resources – I don't get the sense that Tom makes a habit of throwing wet laundry into the dryer in a 6am mild panic.) You wonder what a lazy Sunday looks like for him, or if he has those mornings where he just can’t be bothered to get out of bed??

This is all fine, but what happens for us mere mortals when life shifts? 

I’ve talked with too many people recently who’ve been laid off after 15, 20, 25 years of investing everything in their work. I see the unmooring in their eyes. (I feel it too, I've been laid off twice in my career.)

It's that feeling of "what now?", and also "who am I, really?"

That’s why our outside-of-work passions can be so important. If our work changes (it might), if you shift (you will), those passions will still be there to remind you who you are.

So, here are 3 reminders to keep in mind: 

Love your work, but keep yourself. 

You can be passionate without being consumed. You can give your whole self to the moment without giving your everything to it. I do this when I share my keynotes with audiences: that’s me, up there, connecting fully to what I love in the hope it will give something to you. AND, I have other passions in my life that ground me. 

Passion isn't always "intensity".

Sometimes passion is loud, sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it looks like skydiving or jumping off a mountain, and it can also be learning to cook a new dish at your kitchen table. Both are real: one isn’t better than the other.

You can be more than your work. 

Even if your work is a big part of who you are, it doesn't need to be all you are. Make space for the other parts: your art, your friendships, your curiosity, your rest. Those don’t detract from your passion. In fact, they feed it.

Remember that you get to make YOUR path.

(And for the record, if your story includes an hour on the couch watching labradors with swimming goggles playing with tennis balls I’m cheering for that too :)

PS. My new book "Born to Buzz" (out this summer) is all about rediscovering what you love in work and life. Join the waitlist to get the scoop on launch!

Laura

Founder, Passion Collective